Four and a half months to the day. Almost exactly.
I had assumed it was going to be a one-time thing.
Once is more than plenty; but to have this happen twice in my life?
I don’t believe in coincidences. But I do believe we get the messages we need in forms that are best suited to our nature.
Do you ever wonder, when you have sudden jolts in your own life, that it is God desperately trying to tell you something? God does not have to be desperate. But we human beings can be so blind.
I, for one, am not very good at picking up on subtle hints.
I know God was trying to tell me something the first time.
I needed that first time. That first time saved my life. It was what allowed me to finally leave a job that had messed with my head and sense of well-being. It was what gave me the gall to finally apply to my dream school for graduate studies, thus ushering the phase of my life that I now am most fond and proud of.
Many factors went into making June 13, 2015, Commencement Day, a reality – most obviously, the financial and physical support from my immediate family.
But I know what set it all in motion was that jolt from God (and of course, God’s consistent and constant reinforcement – but that’s not what this post is about)
This week I believe I received my second jolt.
But what is God telling me this time?
Is it really just “don’t stress” like my family has been telling me my entire life? Really? It’s gotta be something more than that!
I know I can’t force a meaning out of this (or anything for that matter). I will only find meaning in whatever happens in retrospect, like with all things in life. But I definitely do want to be more intentional about the things I do and am responsible for. Am I unknowingly drinking haterade? Do I really need to suffix that compliment with a “but”? Is refusing to acknowledge a Facebook friend’s birthday because she didn’t acknowledge mine really a beef worth having? I’m obviously having a lot of fun with this list.
What are you going to do differently now?
It’s a question Mr. Rafia posed to me a few days ago; and it’s worth repeating. As much as I hate to admit, that boy sure has a way of bringing me down to earth, reminding me that there always is a spiritual provenance.
There surely was the first time.
I might not get all the answers this time when I want them. Or even if I do, I might not like what I hear. But I have a feeling that I will be getting something.
I just have to be willing to listen.