Note to self: It will be okay

For the past week or so, I’ve been feeling super overwhelmed and inundated, as my previous post should have made rather clear.

I go through these cycles in my life when all the demands seem too much for me to handle. It could be my perfectionism, my fear of failure…

With respect to failure: What does that even mean, though? And is failure really such a bad thing? I’ve actually received an F in high school as a final grade! Though it was the worst part of my adolescence for a time – because I was convinced that that F in AP Chemistry would forever doom me – by the time I applied to grad school years later, it had no impact whatsoever. Luckily, I did well in undergrad and that’s all that really mattered.

My point is: I’m not so great with dealing with stress. I don’t know many people who would claim they are. The only person that I know who deals with stress well, I think, is my mom. But sometimes I think my mom is not even human – she’s like the closest thing to angel-human I know.

But now, a week later, I have a much better perspective.

When all those demands seem too much, Rafia, what you gotta do is just take it day by day. You hear that phrase all the time, but what does that mean? It means: Do what you can each day – and eventually it will all come together. God has a way of giving you an inspiration or idea when you least expect it and then you realize, “Oh, wow, it’s gonna be okay.”

But even if it’s not your definition of “okay,” you’ll be fine. Just think back to those AP Chemistry days and see how far you’ve come along since then. I revel in failing AP Chemistry now. It’s like a badge of honour!

I’m not not nervous about next week – or next month for that mater – but I feel I’m in a better position to handle it all now. God will help me, I must believe, as God always does.

If nothing else, take copious notes. There’s just something about having things in writing.

11 thoughts on “Note to self: It will be okay

    • And it’s really satisfying when you can take your notes and give a status update to your colleagues. You’re like, “Wow, I got a lot done!” That is literally how I felt after sending an email. Haha.

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  1. I just received a rejection from a dream job of sorts and I was feeling horrible. Your post reminded me that it is not the end of the world. I can get through this and we should feel grateful for everything we have in life. Keep doing what we do and trust that everything will come together. *Hugs* Rafia :)

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    • I’m so sorry to hear that, Jan! I totally understand how you must feel. It’s really tough finding a good job – believe me – but to not land a job you really want, hurts a lot. All I can say from experience with job hunting is that this process will make you more confident and less attached to things. I was obsessed with getting a certain job because it seemed like it aligned with the person I would like to be, but that’s usually not the case. I hope you find a job you like soon *hugs*

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  2. One day at a time – dont look so far ahead, it’ll all be okay <3 As a matter of fact i'm stressing about an exam that I'll have to give soon too because the passing rate was 50% of the class which is just way too much societal pressure for me, lulz. But if I do my best one day at a time, maybe it'll all just come together in the end. My notes are definitely going to help me ;)

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    • Insha’Allah it will all come together in the end. What class is this exam for? If this makes you feel any better: There was this one class I took that I was told by all former students it was impossible to get an A in, but you know what? They were wrong. Insha’Allah, you’ll ace the exam as well! Statistics can’t predict your brilliance, Naureen, Insha’Allah!

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      • Aww thank you!! You’re right, its a bit like pre determinination of fate – How will I work hard when my mind is already setting itself up for mediocrity? (Or God forbid, failure). This is for a certification in my work :) – training for 2 weeks will feel a bit like back to school haha.

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  3. Even though things hardly ever end up as bad as I think they will, I still walk into each new situation expecting the worst (and only the worst). My emotions don’t always respond to logic, so these notes to self seem like a very good idea indeed.

    It WILL all be OK, Rafia! *hug*

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    • Why only the worst? My emotions never respond to logic either. I know it might seem silly to publish a note to self, but I think the feeling behind it is rather universal. Thanks, Laura! *Hugs*

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