I’ve come to accept that I will probably be running 5ks for a while. And maybe that’s okay.
When we make goals for ourselves, it’s natural to want to reach them quickly.
Isn’t that what our society implicitly tells us? Make a goal. Accomplish it. And then on to the next! It’s like we’re supposed to be workhorses that never stop.
Do we ever take the time to examine why we’re always in a rush?
Does achieving those goals ever truly satisfy us?
No. Once we achieve something we thought at one point was insurmountable, we belittle that thing, and then look at others who are running marathons (to use the running metaphor, but in my case, it’s not merely a metaphor: I’m literally comparing myself to people who run marathons).
I look back on all my past achievements and they almost mean nothing now. “Yeah, but I didn’t do that.”
Even comparing myself to where I was before doesn’t help. I didn’t beat my personal best this morning. I can make excuses, sure, but it doesn’t change the fact that I haven’t improved as much I would have liked.
Does this mean I give up?
I think back to speech team in high school. I joined to improve my public speaking skills. But review after review (in a single year, mind you) convinced me that public speaking wasn’t going to be a thing I would be able to conquer. So, I “quit” the second year. Perhaps if I had taken those bad reviews in stride and continued throughout my four years, I would have improved. Who knows?
But because I quit, I will always see this decision of mine with regret.
Things take time to come to fruition. People spend years mastering a particular skill. Why should I be any different?